Poem of the Heart...

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim....

Left me, abandoned me, forget me, neglected me.

You're not mine, Your soul is not mine, your heart is not mine, your mind is not mine.

Felt PAIN, felt strain.

Felt hatred, felt scattered.

Felt mad, felt sad.

The emotional, the disposal.

The confusion, the illusion.

CRY, try, shy, fly.

The tears and the bears.

Of why?

I love you, I hate you.

Please...leave.....

Bandung - A Trip To Remember

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim...

Alhamdulillah, praise to Allah S.W.T for giving me an opportunity to go on vacation to Bandung with my beloved mom and dad.. The trip was merrier as we were joined by my dad's friends and their cute children.. For me, the trip was very exhausting yet very meaningful to me.. Most important is I am very grateful as my SPC's registration date is on 10th February 2014.. So, this means that I still got the chance to join the trip.. Allah had planned everything very nicely and beautifully.. Alhamdulillah.. <3

Let's go to the best part of the trip.

I say that the trip was meaningful because I learnt so many new things from it. I learn how to be grateful and appreciate our own beloved country Malaysia. Because Bandung, is a very compact and crowded city.. Even an inch of land were not wasted there.. Their houses were not like in Malaysia, where we still have spaces and compound around it. Besides, the housing area in Malaysia is orderly arranged, but in Bandung, the houses are scattered.. The road is very narrow and never skip from jammed.. However, the drivers there are very prudent. Even though the cars are crowded in the road, they never got mad or drive crazily. There are no accident happen in the narrow and crowded road.

Ok, this is the part yang 'macam-macam rasa'..

Hmm..what can I say about the people in Bandung? Most of them who are poor are willing to do any work to get money.. The elders sell key chains, bags, and any other souvenirs with variety range of prices. So we, as the tourist really need to beware and brilliant to negotiate the prices with them so that we can get good things at low prices.. Or else, you will be cheated! (like me..huhu.. =[ ) Oh yeah, I bet you'll be surprised to see small kids at the age of 4-6 years old selling flowers, tissues and even pestle and mortar! :O There are also men who work as a traffic controller.. They will stand in the middle of the road, especially in any junction to stop cars and give passage to other cars who would like to turn.. But, we must give tips to them.. haha, so that's how they will get money.. *unique!

Hmm..how about the food? Everyday we just eat nasi padang, nasi padang, and nasi padang. Haha, because only that food that can suite our taste and stomach. Oh yea, not to forget, people there love salty food. So, most of the food like fried rice, fried noodle and even fried fish are salty! Huhu.. T.T But so far we still alive and not starving, thank Allah! hehe..

Overall, Bandung is a great place for shopping. All the items are cheap, (if we know how to nego). But if we plan to go on a calming and picturesque vacation, I would not recommend Bandung, because the only picturesque scene that you can get is at Tangkuban Parahu, the volcano.. But indeed, Tangkuban Parahu serve a very magnificent Allah's creation! Subhanallah!

Hmm..Vacation to Bandung also had changed my perceptions towards other people, especially a normal school student and a 6-year old kid. All this while I thought it's hard to find a normal school student who is pious, polite and have a very great respect for the elderly, but in that trip, I found one. An 18-year old boy, the eldest in family, the son of my dad's friend. His name? Haha, no need to mention la.. I seriously amazed on how such a very young boy who studies in a normal school (not a boarding school or even a religious school) love to join an Islamic Dakwah mission with the Ustazs.. Because all this while I only found that kind of person in boarding school and religious school of course. Well, indeed, DON'T JUDGE A BOOK BY IT'S COVER.

And for that 6-year old kid, Sofi Adlina, also a child of my dad's friend. A very cute little girl who has very pleasant attitude and act like a big kid even though she's just only 6 year old. I'm impressed! She was very close to me during the trip, kept calling me 'kakak, kakak' anywhere I went to. Haha.. But she's fine and not annoying at all. So, I guess Allah had sent this kid to me so that later I will behave nicely towards my own niece, a 6-year old kid too. Insya-Allah.. 

 

Guess that's all about my trip to Bandung.. End. ^^

p/s : Haha.. I don't have that boy's picture. Buat apa nak ambil gambar die? -.-" haha..

~Somewhere Only We Know~

Bismillahirrahmnirrahim...

Today, in the early of the morning, I would like to share a song, with its lyric of course. The song was sang by a band called Keane. Actually this is an old song, and I just found it while watching the LOL movie.. From the first time my ears caught this song, I fell in love with it. The music is calming..it touched my heart somehow.. And indeed, when I read the lyric, it full of deep meaning, which till now I can't fully understand it..but I do know it's about life.. Well, yeah, music is part of my life.. And I express my thoughts from the song I heard sometimes.. And here is the lyric goes… -

Somewhere Only We Know - Keane

I walked across an empty land
I knew the pathway like the back of my hand
I felt the earth beneath my feet
Sat by the river and it made me complete

Oh simple thing where have you gone?
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin

I came across a fallen tree
I felt the branches of it looking at me
Is this the place we used to love?
Is this the place that I've been dreaming of?

Oh simple thing where have you gone?
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin

And if you have a minute why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go
Somewhere only we know?
Somewhere only we know?

Oh simple thing where have you gone?
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin

And if you have a minute why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go?
So why don't we go?

Ah-ah-ah
Ah-ah-ah

This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go
Somewhere only we know?
Somewhere only we know?
Somewhere only we know?

Erm...I'm not the kind of good girl actually, but still, it's not forbidden to listen to music as a hobby sometimes right? Everybody has a past. Like the quotes in 'Setia Hujung Nyawa' - 

"Tiada insan suci yang tidak mempunyai masa lampau, dan tiada insan berdosa yang tidak mempunyai masa depan."  

But, the question is, when will a person fully realize of his / her mistakes and make a move to start a new life? Some people had realizes that they had made mistakes and had had the consciousness to change. But they just don't know how to start. And some people already make a move to start but unfortunately, they just don't have the strength to continue or in simple word, ISTIQAMAH. Maybe this kind of people don't really deeply understand the meaning of ISTIQAMAH or they actually don't have a positive surrounding to ISTIQAMAH. As for me, honestly, I’m still searching which type I am actually.

Sincerely, a girl in confusion in the early of the morning.

p/s : I’m so totally tired of playing with feelings. Yeah, the fact is, girls talk and think with emotion, while boys talk and think with brain. The End.

Jangan Pandang Rendah!

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim...

Alhamdulillah, hari ni 2 Januari 2014! Dah masuk tahun baru.. =) Syukur ke hadrat Ilahi kerana kita masih dipanjangkan umur..And..as I told you earlier, I'm in a waiting mood.. But now, not anymore.. Alhamdulillah, I've got the offer to further my study in the University of Nottingham in program pharmacy foundation.. And if I pass the foundation with flying colours, I'll be continuing my study in Bachelor of Pharmacy in the same university..

Ok.. Just about a month time I'll be studying in a university! I can't believe it! Seriously..Feel like I am still a kid. =p And guess what, when I'm 19, I'll be staying in my own rent house with my housemates! And the real life journey begin...Cooking, bills, groceries, furniture..all by myself (or housemates).. wawawawawa...haha.. XD how do I feel about it? Well of course nervous.. am I gonna get through it? Hopefully I can.. =) Insya-Allah..

Hmmm....we all are growing up.. and..do you know why am I choosing to be a pharmacist instead of a geologist? It's because of the future.. Being a pharmacist does not require you to be around the world like a geologist does.. Well, I admit that I love to travel, and who does not want to travel around the world right?? But..for me..I don't wanna travel around the world by myself.. I want to go with my loves ones.. <3 Hahaha..womens.. I'm not the type who works too hard / workaholic.. I just wanna have a happy family..and be with my family.. Insya-Allah..may Allah ease my journey to achieve that dreams.. Aminn..

Why do people think that being a pharmacist is not a glamour career?? Hey, don't underestimate the career of pharmacist please..! Pharmacy is a wide range of study..even though it's not as glamour as doctor or engineer, but they are useful to the society whatt..They can invent medicines that can cure illnesses.. Thay are responsible for the safety usage of drugs. Jadi ahli farmasi pon boleh kaya ape...buka la farmasi sendiri.. Nak cari glamour sangat eh, tak pe, kita usaha sampai dapat pangkat 'professor' kat depan ye.. ^^

Haha..manusia2... Buat apa nak cari kesenangan dunia? Aku bukan jenis manusia yang mencari kemewahan harta.. Aku hanya ingin kebahagiaan di dunia dan akhirat.. Masih teringat lagi kata-kata guru Matematik kesayangan, Mr. Haziq,

 "kita sebagai manusia, matmalat kita hanya satu je, iaitu nak mencari REDHA ALLAH.. buatlah apa-apa kerja sekali pon, jadilah apa-apa sekali pon, doktor ke, engineer ke, even menjadi seorang cikgu pon, kena tetapkan matlamat untuk cari dan dapatkan redha allah..jadi setiap tindakan kita tu mestilah terarah untuk mencapai matlamat tu.. kalau kerja penat-penat, tapi niat bukan untuk redha Allah, rugi je.. mungkin kita akan dapat kejayaan dunia, tapi akhirat? siapa kata kerja dakwah tu golongan ustaz, ustazah je yang boleh buat.. kerja jadi cikgu pon boleh sebarkan dakwah, itu matlamat utama hidup kita sebenarnya.."

 Subhanallah.. :') *tak ingat lah susunan ayat sebenar cikgu tu, tapi maksudnya lebih kurang camtula.. =)

So friends, betulkanlah mind-set kita, perspektif kita.. Jangan hanya pandang seseorang berdasarkan 'title'or gelaran semata-mata, sebab the finale atau pengakhirannya nanti, kita semua akan dapat title 'Allahyarham / Allahyarhamah' jugak.. Dudukla rumah sebesar mana sekali pon, tapi akhirnya nanti kita semua duduk dalam rumah yang sama iaitu 'liang lahad'.. Naik la kenderaan besar mana sekali pon, tapi akhirnya nanti kita semua akan naik 'van jenazah' jugak.. Huhuhu..takut kan dengar? Kalau macam tu insaflah! Inilah hakikat sebenar.. Yang membezakan bukannya pangkat dan harta, tapi ilmu dan iman di dada.. Mudah-mudahan Allah bagi kita kekuatan untuk BERHIJRAH dan ISTIQAMAH.. Wallahua'lam..

*cewah..macam bagi ceramah agama pulak..hehe.. dapat inspirasi daripada Semanis Kurma.. =p

p/s : tak apalah mak, abah, pak ngah, mak ngah, mak lang, pak lang..kalau tak dapat tengok adik jadi engineer, Insya-Allah adik akan cuba bawak balik menantu engineer eh..insya-Allah.. Aminn... =) 

Interview...

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim...

Today I just wanna share about my experience in interview. Last week I had an interview for a scholarship.. The simplest word that I can say about the interview was 'unexpected'.. The session was held ONLY in groups.. An issue was given, and we need to discuss it in group, and of course fully in English.. A group consist of 5 people, and my teammates were all from different colleges. We've an issue titled 'Economy Downturn, And How To Reduce University Expenditure'. There're 3 options given, which were Students, Management Board, and Professor points.. I said that the interview was unexpected because first, my preferred course was not offered, which is pharmacy..and I am seriously in dilemma on what else to choose since I dislike engineering..(or specifically I dislike Physics.. =p), and next, we were not allowed to bring along our certificates file.. Then, there were no individual session where like common interviews, we need to brief about ourselves.. None. 

And as for me, I did my best, even though I know my chance to get the scholarships was not quite bright since the pharmacy course was not offered.. I just do the best because I wanna test myself, and I wanna get the experience of real interview.. Alhamdulillah.I succeed to get what I want in that interview..and I am happy that I can share it with my friends.. But...one thing that I'm quite disappointed is about the selection system. Some of my friends did not know about that interview cause they didn't receive any calls, but their names were listed. Next, the selection process was mainly based on the cgpa, which is 3.85 above.. I was not agree with it cause the cgpa system in each college was not the same.. There were some colleges which are lenient in giving marks to the students in exams, so, automatically their cgpa is high.. As in my college, I believe there are many of my friends who actually deserve to get high cgpa, and they are qualified to be in that interview because of their great leadership and communicating skills.. I can see that majority of the students present in that interview were majority of the 'bookworm' type.. (including me I guess). *Sigh*

Oh yeah, I heard one of the officers involve in that interview said that the interview was held to choose students who are MATURED and will not face any problems such as CULTURE SHOCK when they are send to overseas.. Now I get it about why do we need to fill in our Pendidikan Islam's mark in a form given..

I agree with that. Yeah, in the end, I get it... Why was the interview held just only in grouping? Because they already know that students present in that interview were all having good academic background. What do they need to see was our thinking level, leadership and cooperative skills, and how do we behave in a critical situation. And of course, our speaking skill, which I was not really good at. =(  

So..I guess that's all for tonight.. 

Still wanna thanks a friend of mine for supporting me to write. =)

Seloka Lawrencium... =)

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim...

Here's one of my masterpiece that I wrote around August this year. I just love to write this kind of masterpiece..It's interesting.. I've made one during primary school, and when I was in form 3, I made a class video.. So for the form 5 session., here it goes... =)

Seloka Lawrencium….

Ini seloka gurauan dari kami,

Ingin bercerita tentang kelas 501 KFC,

Inilah kisah keluarga kecil kami,

Dipimpin guru kelas, Cg. Fairul, yang baik hati.

Muhammad Azim President kami,

Sangat optimis, dialah bakal doktor gigi,

V.P kami Nadia Asri,

Gelarannya Oopet, kami yang beri.

Kecil-kecil dah pandai berpoilitik,

Itulah Si Genius Hazim Afifi,

Dalam kelas kami ada Exco Akademik,

Dialah Wan Muhammad Ashraf, bakal ahli sufi.

Rostdan Akhir penyeri kelas kami,

Jangan main-main, dialah V.P LDP!

Sangat berseni, itulah Qayyum Qamari,

Dalam diam dia jadi pakar ICT!

Matanya sepet dan berkaca mata,

Itulah Ariff Adham yang diam-diam ubi berisi,

Seorang lagi teman yang juga berkaca mata,

Sangat sarkastik orangnya, dialah Ahmad Fitri.

Hidupnya bolehlah dikatakan persis anak raja,

Dialah Qawiem Alif Petra yang sangat rileks orangnya,

Dalam bab tidur dialah jadi raja,

Bermimpi untuk ke awan, Othman Ariff lah namanya.

Bangganya kami sebab ada sasterawan,

Dialah Amirul Iqmal yang gah di medan bahasa,

Dalam bola jaring tiada yang boleh lawan,

‘Shud the Sharp Shooter’, atlet yang berbisa.

Dalam kelas kami pon ada ramai orang Korea,

Yang sangat suka berceloteh, namanya Nabila,

Seorang lagi yang comel lagi pandai bergaya,

Mai dari Beseri itulah Adleen Rushda.

Walaupun pendiam tapi hebat orangnya,

Bakal arkitek, Hani Nasuha namanya,

Putih melepak macam anak Nyonya,

Ummu Zikriyah, macam ratu orangya.

Ni lagi seorang anak Korea,

Suka tersengih, Faez nama pendeknya,

Satu geng mata sepet dengan Fatin Farhana,

Dialah Exco Kebudayaan yang sangat tabah orangnya.

Izzati Ibrahim mai dari Penang,

Suka bersendiri, mencari identiti diri,

Amira Rahim pun anak kelahiran Penang,

Bercita-cita tinggi nak jadi ahli farmasi.

Sentiasa positif, namanya Fatin Nabila,

Merah terang itulah warna kegemarannya,

Sangat minat akaun, namanya Sharifah Nabiha,

Turun riadah itu memang hobinya.

Nak lagi bangga, kelas kami ada olahragawati,

Itulah Nazhatul Najihah yang tinngi macam lidi,

Kecil molek orangnya, selalu merendah diri,

Itulah Nad Sidek, boleh jadi isteri mithali.

SPM 2013 itulah destinasi kami,

Nak dapat Straight A+ itulah matlamat kami,

Ayuhlah 501 Lawrencium, kita bersatu hati,

Gegarkan seluruh maktab dengan result kita nanti!

Sampai sini sahaja seloka dari kami,

Kalau ada salah silap kami susun 10 jari,

Setiap kenangan pastikan tersemat di hati,

Moga bertemu kembali pada suatu masa nanti.

Insya-Allah… =)

The End of 2013...

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim...

Wow..this blog is surely dusty,,hehe... I thought that I will not continue blogging anymore, but due to a friend's request, I'll write.. Hmm..why am I planing not to blog anymore? Actually I am not planing to quit, I just wanna open a new book. Yeah, new phase, with new environment, so of course new stories.. Hence, I'm actually thinking to make new blog. A more matured one. So let's just pray may 2014 is not a really busy year so that I can spend time for the new blog making.   =)

Okay, move on to the latest news.. What's happening in the end of 2013??
For sure, if I can scream, "I've done my SPM!!!" Haha..yeah..it's reality.. But still, I feel like dreaming. No more school uniforms, merrily sports day, and all those 'cute' things we used to do during school-phase time, or to be exact, the immature phase, or in other word, the 'identity-crisis' phase, or we could just simply say.. in 'teenage world'. After this, we're going to the 'half-adult' phase, haha, I said that cause for me, the real adult age is '20', when the first number turns '2'. =p Well, I don't wanna talk much bout this half-adult phase cause I'm not really facing it yet. So, I don't have much experience to elaborate it clearly and creatively.. XD

Soooo..let's move on to another chapter..
Huh? You wanna me talk about the scholarships? The SPC? Hmmm...I don't feel like I wanna talk about it right now.. Cause now I'm in 'waiting' mood..So I don't know what the result would be yet.. For sure everyone is hoping for the best. Everyone wants SPC, the simplest way of continuing our studies.. Hopefully Allah will open the chance for me and my friends to get the SPC.. Amin..

Come again? Wanna me talk about the SPM? Did I went through it nicely? So far I just could say Alhamdulillah..and if I were given a word to describe how's SPM 2013, I would choose...'tough'..hehe... Naaaaa...don't wanna talk bout it.. Cause when I think about it, I will always come out with the 'IF' and 'WHY', which show regret..and it is definitely not a good thing to talk about.. k? -_-

What I've been doing for the past 3 weeks after the SPM huh? Well I live, of course.. =p Eat, sleep, movies, books, musics etc.. Nothing special... Yeah, my house is not around a place where I can join any interesting classes.. If I can, I will love to join the music class, or the dancing class, or the computer class, or the language class, (but NOT the driving class =p, I just don't ready yet to drive..hee) But I just can't.. =( NVM..

To be honest, I'm missing Langkawi so much.. Even though there were a lots of painful truth there, but there were still sweet memories to be remembered.. What I miss the most about Langkawi is the surrounding.. The calmness of the scenery, the picturesque view, and somehow I miss the Cenang beach..haha..(IDK why..) I really want to see the sunset and sunrise at the beach.. But till now I still don't have the chance yet.. But I am grateful cause I've got the chance to see the sunset from the Raudhatul Muttaqin surau of MRSM Langkawi..Subhanallah..it was very an outstanding view..

Next, ha. I've finished 4 from 5 novels of Hlovate just in 3 weeks.. Haha.. I know, it's actually not a big deal pon.. and plus, some would say that I am really outdated.. Nvm whatever they wanna say.. as long as I'm happy because I've succeed to buy those books with my own money, and read it in a very leisure time.. =D Reading Hlovate's books makes me feel alive.. I really impressed with the awesomeness of the books. Hlovate is just so genius to delivery the messages especially about Islam in a very stylish and light way.. The book that I really love the most is the 'Versus' because I can feel it related to me somehow.. You just need to read it by yourself only then you can feel it. <3

Hmmmmm..I guess I wanna stop here.. I'll write more in the next entry k.. Adios! =D